If the title of this blog is something you didn’t know, then this is for you, and me too. Don’t panic, we still have over 3 months before election day. During the next 3 months we will hear a little more about N.Z politics each day until it finally becomes a sickening overload. That will be election day.

It’s tempting to try to ignore the whole bloody thing. It’s so boring and my vote never achieved anything before so why would I expect my vote to make a difference this year? Truth is, it wont. So why would I bother? Thinking about politics is just a waste of my time and my brain energy. (Thinking burns up calories but I never heard  of it as a substitute for exercise). I think I know why I will waste my time and my precious brain energy. It’s because it’s my democratic right. If people like us don’t vote the government pretends we don’t exist and treats us like  we don’t exist. Zero votes equals zero interest minus zero consideration.

I don’t pretend to be unbiased. I have my own political opinions. They are fairly shallow and extremely self centred opinions but if I don’t vote for what I like and what I believe in, who will? I might be biased but I am sort of fair.  I have an extreme dislike of the leaders of both the main parties. The only 2 guys that could possibly end up running the country and they both make me ashamed to be a Kiwi man. So I am hassling you to make sure you are registered to vote. You don’t have to vote if you are registered, you can choose not to. If not registered you have no choice. I’m very lazy and if I did it anyone can. Except prison inmates which is pointless and unfair.  This probably makes it easier for politicians to not think about them at all. Zero consideration.

I hope that by the time election day arrives I will have decided what I’m going to do with my votes. I say votes because we all get 2 votes each. There’s the party vote, which sounds like a fun time but it’s not really. Unless ticking a piece of paper while you stand net to a big cardboard box is what you do for fun. I think the fun is in the build up to making the decision, it all goes downhill pretty quick after that. We also get a vote to decide which person represents our area. The area we live in is called our electorate. The electorate is not like a town or a suburb which everybody who lives there knows. It’s more like a school zone with whatever side of the train tracks or road your house is on controls which school your kids go to. Boundaries change over time to suit whoever has political power. Governments change the boundaries if they think it will help them win elections and hold on to power and influence. They also change the names of the electorates. I don’t even know what mine is called. I will find out. I suggest you find out which electorate you are registered in too. If you are not registered you can’t vote so make sure you are registered, or not. Whatever. If you are planning on voting National, they will probably win easy without your vote so don’t worry about it, sit down, put your feet up and pour a glass of that drink you really like. If you were planning a vote for Labour, they’ve got no chance with or without your vote. So relax, put your feet up and think about 2017.

Next time, hear why I think the Greens are a bit too kooky, mana/internet way too kooky, and the Conservatives on another kooky planet (or maybe faking it from a sound stage in Henderson Valley), also what I think of the N.Z First youth wing, the young winnies.